In Lieu Of Flowers

A member of my family passed this week.  The loss was sad.  But as I dealt with my feelings, I realized that I am also mourning the world before Covid.  Looking for solace, I came across the following.and found it cheering.  I have not been able to track its source.  It was apparently written by a patient in palliative care.  I hope you don’t mind me sharing it.

“Although I love flowers very much, I won’t see them when I’m gone. So in lieu of flowers:  Buy a book of poetry written by someone still alive, sit outside with a cup of tea, a glass of wine, and read it out loud, by yourself or to someone, or silently.
Spend some time with a single flower. A rose maybe. Smell it, touch the petals.
Really look at it.
Drink a nice bottle of wine with someone you love.
Or, Champagne. And think of what John Maynard Keynes said, “My only regret in life is that I did not drink more Champagne.” Or what Dom Perignon said when he first tasted the stuff: “Come quickly! I am tasting stars!”
Take out a paint set and lay down some colours.
Watch birds. Common sparrows are fine. Pigeons, too. Geese are nice. Robins.
In lieu of flowers, walk in the trees and watch the light fall into it. Eat an apple, a really nice big one. I hope it’s crisp.
Have a long soak in the bathtub with candles, maybe some rose petals.
Sit on the front stoop and watch the clouds. Have a dish of strawberry ice cream in my name.
If it’s winter, have a cup of hot chocolate outside for me. If it’s summer, a big glass of ice water.
If it’s autumn, collect some leaves and press them in a book you love. I’d like that.
Sit and look out a window and write down what you see. Write some other things down.
In lieu of flowers,
I would wish for you to flower.
I would wish for you to blossom, to open, to be beautiful.”

4 Replies to “In Lieu Of Flowers”

  1. That is lovely, Linda. I’m so sorry for your loss, but what a peaceful way to deal with grief. Thank you so much for sharing this with us.

  2. What a beautiful message that I will take to heart Linda. I’m sorry for your loss and will think of you as I smell my flower or sip special wine . Warmly, Bev

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